People are different: The answer to my question before I pose it.
Yet I wonder - When mohos finally make a decision to seriously stop worrying about church involvement/status and embrace their sexuality, why do some guys remain relatively stable and essentially unchanged individuals, while other guys seem to flit to a polar extreme and indulge in stuff that has nothing specifically to do with being a homosexual; stuff like extreme tattoos and piercings, drug and alcohol abuse, and promiscuity?
Do I think there's anything wrong with getting a tattoo or a piercing? No. Having an occasional drink or dabbling in recreational drugs? Not really. Having sex with someone before any long-term commitment has been established with them? As long as it's safe-sex, again, not really.
Yet there seems to be this stereotypical picture of what a homosexual is: A person that revels in every vice or shady thing permitted in our society. Someone without morals. Someone to keep the kids away from.
When I came out and left the church a couple years ago the only thing that really changed about me was that I started drinking coffee. I didn't (and still don't) drink alcohol because I have far too many relatives who are alcoholics, not because God doesn't want me to drink. I didn't get any piercings or tattoos because I think I'd eventually regret doing it, not because I don't want to defile my "temple". When I started dating I stayed away from the sites that are centered around hook-ups and used www.connexion.org I found a wonderful guy there, dated him for a month before we ever got physical, and now we're engaged and have been together for two years going strong.
I don't want to prescribe anything for anyone, let me say that. If you're the type who feels he needs to explore the limits of himself and dabble in everything he was denied when he was an active member in the church, then fine.
I don't think people who do that, though, are doing us any favors in our fight for gay marriage. It perpetuates an unhelpful image that keeps people from relating to us. Nor do I think it's helping the moho fence-sitters who want and really need to embrace their sexuality because they think doing so means they'll turn into a drugged-out slut freak-show.
What do you think?